enlarge my heart, oh God!

i am not feeling artistic or poetic tonight. just had a few thoughts i wanted to share. 


i just got back from new years conference (nationals conference). talk about a loaded week. so many powerful speakers and messages but i think the main thing i am taking away with me is a verse that was shared from psalm 119:32 "I will run in the way of your commandments when you enlarge my heart." this past summer when i was on beach project the verse that hit home the most that i also shared in another blog post was Phil. 2:14-16 "Do all things without grumbling or disputing, ¹⁵ that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, ¹⁶ holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain." Its interesting because the truth that hits me the hardest is the part saying i will obey your commandments WHEN you enlarge my heart and then in phil. when it says holding fast to the word of life...i did not run...or labor in vain. its interesting the way the Lord keeps highlighting that for me. my problem is that i think a lot of myself. I expect obedience and good deeds from myself and constantly fail and live in sin. the underlying issue is that i have not allowed the Lord to enlarge my heart and i have not held fast to the word of life. in and of my flesh i am so inadequate of any good. if there is anything thats been made clear in my life, it is that.